A drunken poll

Aug. 31st, 2009 at 3:59 PM

Q and I were having this conversation over the weekend, so it sounded like a poll to me.

Say your SO gets totally plastered and ends up making out with someone, then can't remember anything the next day:

Poll #1451434 Drunken Make-Out Sessions

Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All. Participants: 37

It's...

View Answers

Cheating

24(64.9%)

Not cheating

13(35.1%)

and...

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Forgivable

26(72.2%)

Not forgivable

10(27.8%)

(I suppose the pre-supposition here is that you're not already in an open relationship, but you can answer without that preface if you so desire, or perhaps your rules don't include kissing, so explanatory comments are welcome.)

Comments

( 16 comments — Comment )

neko_taka

Aug. 31st, 2009 08:18 pm (UTC)

If my lover was to get THAT plastered, I wouldn't want to be with him in the first place! I hate drunks SO much.

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esprix

Aug. 31st, 2009 08:32 pm (UTC)

I do, too. Why did I marry one? :D

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(Deleted comment)

esprix

Aug. 31st, 2009 08:31 pm (UTC)

Great. I'm married to a drunk! :)

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(Deleted comment)

esprix

Aug. 31st, 2009 09:12 pm (UTC)

Indeed, he's only done it once, and I think that was enough to scare him out of overimbibing again any time soon.

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moonpuppy61

Aug. 31st, 2009 08:38 pm (UTC)

Drinking so much he can't remember what he was doing and he is no longer in college... it squicks me right on one of my buttons.

Cheating, if its not specifically been approved then its cheating.

Forgivable.. well that is actually a personal choice and very subjective. But I err on the side of NOT

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bearassed

Aug. 31st, 2009 08:54 pm (UTC)

Hmm with me, kissing is ok as long as it is discussed previously, but excessive drinking is not really tolerated. I don't see kissing as a problem since it is just that. No sex involved or implied. If this was a one time thing then I can forgive but will explain not forget.

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jkusters

Aug. 31st, 2009 09:00 pm (UTC)

I think it's unforgivable tastelessness, on the verge of cheating, but not quite crossing a line.

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doniago

Aug. 31st, 2009 09:23 pm (UTC)

Cheating but forgivable. The first and only time it occurs on my watch.

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(Deleted comment)

justplainbryan

Sep. 1st, 2009 04:41 am (UTC)

I love you, choo!

I said "forgivable", and "not cheating", because it isn't cheating if you weren't of sound judgment at the the time HOWEVER that's not to say there wouldn't be hard feelings and some serious discussion afterward. If my spouse got so drunk that her inhibitions were released such that making out with someone else were to occur without my express approval (be it male or female. The approval process does occur much faster with a female candidate.), I would have to question ever being OK with said spouse getting that plastered ever again. In other words, a level of trust would be lost that would take a very long time to regain. We would not be partying the same way ever again, to say the least.

And if it appeared that the third party making out with the spouse were completely sober and apparently trying to take advantage of the drunk spouse behind my back, well, suffice it to say there would be "words" exchanged by me and said third party.

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sistercoyote

Aug. 31st, 2009 10:18 pm (UTC)

Cheating but forgivable. I'd have more trouble forgiving the drinking to blackout than the kissing.

Also, to a certain extent what

javamaven1 said.

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logisticslad

Aug. 31st, 2009 10:36 pm (UTC)

If the relationship is not open, or this behavior was not specifically discussed, then it qualifies as cheating in my book. This is because kissing is an intimate activity and people observing from the outside will certainly talk about it. Also, drinking to the point of losing control implies intention to do so, therefore not so forgivable, especially if it happens repeatedly.

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nolly

Aug. 31st, 2009 11:38 pm (UTC)

I'd be a lot more concerned about the drunkenness that the activity per se. Even before the "not remembering" point, drunk enough to lose enough judgment to make that decision is a problem for me.

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mikhalmc

Sep. 1st, 2009 03:12 am (UTC)

I have to say, I'm highly disappointed to hear about this behavior. I knew that Q was a party boi, but I really thought he was above behavior like this. Especially at his age.

I agree with unclrashid's comments above. Drinking this much is fairly self destructive. If you find it in yourself to forgive him for this transgression, then you should focus on the drinking issue and get to the bottom of why he feels the need to go that far.

I hope you guys can work through it.

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esprix

Sep. 1st, 2009 03:22 am (UTC)

OMG NO! This was not something that happened to us! No no no no no! :) I think it happened to one of Q's friend's boyfriends or something, so we were just talking about it in the abstract.

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