My friend Yudi from San Diego called me tonight, and while we were catching up he told me my ex, TC, died over the summer from stomach cancer. How extremely surreal.
TC and I dated for a couple of months, and right around the time I'd really started to think seriously of him as a boyfriend, he said someone he'd met before me, who he felt equally strongly about, was moving to San Diego, and even though it was a hard choice to make, he decided to go with the other guy. I was really stunned, and although he made attempts to be friends with me immediately afterward, I told him I needed my space, which he respected.
About a year later we got back in touch, and he reluctantly informed me that the guy who'd moved in with him turned out to be a total jerk - he had to abandon his apartment, he gave him all kinds of money, the whole shebang. And although he wasn't really ready to get into another relationship (and still felt sheepish about dumping me in the first place), and I'd moved on, we did flirt with the idea of getting back together, but it wasn't meant to be. We still hung out from time to time and kept in touch, and I always had a little special place in my heart for him.
According to Yudi he'd been sick, lost weight, and by the time they figured out something was wrong, they discovered it was cancer, and it was too far progressed to do anything about. If I remember correctly he was only a couple of years younger than me.
And what's really odd is just a couple of weeks ago I went looking for him on MySpace and was thinking about him.
This is really just weird. I just went hunting for pictures of him and, of course, can't find any. Bah. Like my friend Randy who also passed away many years ago, I struggle with something to remember them by other than memories. He had a lover when he passed, so maybe Yudi or one of my other San Diego friends can put me in touch with him so I can at least get a picture of him. (And I'd really like some more information - anyone out there know where I can see his obituary?)
So, TC, wherever you may be, you're remembered by me. Salut.
Edited to add: Found his obituary. Heh. I'd forgotten about the scuba diving - he used to keep his equipment in the bathtub. That always amused me for some reason. :) And "debating his friends?" HA! He was an argumentative jerk sometimes, but yeah, he did like to debate. Hee! It seems appropriate his ashes were scattered at sea. I'll have to drop a note to his partner if I can track him down and share some stories. Wow.