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Life spins on a dime, folks

Oh my god. Yesterday our office "den mother," a woman I really trust and respect and like, was out for the day because her daughter finally had her baby, a boy.

This morning, while nursing, the daughter died.


Not even 12 hours old and that baby just lost its mother and my co-worker lost her daughter. I thought she had it bad because she divorced her husband of 10 years earlier this year, was recently told she'd have to have surgery for carpal tunnel, and is in the middle of selling her house. The only blessings in her life were that her daughter just got married over the summer, and was having her beautiful grandson.

And now she's gone.

Life so fucking sucks sometimes.

I'm going to make every effort to get her contact info so I can do something for her since tomorrow's my last day, so I'll likely never see her again. I feel so bad for her. I can't even begin to imagine what she's going through right now. God, at least my father had lived a long, full life - this girl was in her 20's and just starting her life. So amazingly sad.

Edited to add: Found out the baby was born around 3:00 a.m. and she died around 11:00 a.m.


( 19 comments — Comment )
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:41 pm (UTC)
that is just heartbreaking :(
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:47 pm (UTC)
Amazingly so.
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:43 pm (UTC)
oh. wow.

How absolutely nightmare-ish.

A care package for the Dad and Baby and your coworker will be appreciated. Something like a pasta meal (pasta, jar of sauce, shaker cheese), a special toy or blanket for the baby, and a donation to a charity.

Huge hugs, as it sounds like the "den mother" is well respected in the office. It's going to impact her hard for a long time.
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:45 pm (UTC)
I'm sending money, flat-out. I know my mother needed it when my dad died, and I also know she's not in the best shape financially (we talked quite a bit about her divorce and selling her house). I just have to make sure I get her address before I leave.
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:45 pm (UTC)
omg................. simply omg
i can only partially imagine this. stuff like this has happened in my family but not directly to me with anyone close....

sometimes you think things like this only happen in third world places and we are so much more advanced than that now.
i will of course pray for her and that the creator bring her comfort.
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:46 pm (UTC)
She was in the hospital and she died. When it's your time, it's your time. They don't know why yet, but they're thinking a blot clot. Childbirth is not an easy process.

And people wonder why Quincy and I filled out our next-of-kin paperwork already. You never know.
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:55 pm (UTC)
God, that's AWFUL. How shocking and terrible for her whole family.
Oct. 20th, 2005 06:57 pm (UTC)
OMG. That is sooooooooooo sad.

If it makes any sense to do so, pass on my virtual hugs.
Oct. 20th, 2005 07:29 pm (UTC)
That's pretty scary.

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Oct. 20th, 2005 08:09 pm (UTC)
If I find out I'll post.
Oct. 20th, 2005 08:04 pm (UTC)
My heart has seriously dropped for all parties concerned. Very scary indeed. I hope they find the cause so that they will know what to look out for in the future.
Oct. 20th, 2005 08:49 pm (UTC)
That is absolutely horrible!
Oct. 21st, 2005 03:58 am (UTC)
I'm so sorry....what a horrible thing for your friends to have to deal with! My prayers go with them. I can't even imagine how awful this is for them. It was so bad when my mom was diagnosed terminal, but she was 78 years old and at least she had HAD a very good life and one of her choosing. Your friend...too young. My heart goes out to them. Sorry, I know I'm babbling....but I just know how bad it was for me....I can't even begin to imagine how awful it is in this cirumstance.
Oct. 21st, 2005 05:32 pm (UTC)
My dad was 76 when he passed away, so yeah, I agree this just can't compare. It's so shocking.
Oct. 21st, 2005 05:15 am (UTC)
OMG! My deepest sympathies to your coworker. It has to be a special hell for her to have such a great joy (the new grandson) offset by the loss of her daughter. I know one of my greatest personal nightmares has always been that I'd still be around to grieve my daughter. Parents *should* go first, not their children. It sets the natural order upside down. My prayers are with her, her son-in-law and that precious little grandbaby.

(((hugs))) to you, as well. Something like this really makes us put our own personal ups and downs in perspective doesn't it?
Oct. 21st, 2005 12:37 pm (UTC)
Oct. 21st, 2005 12:51 pm (UTC)
My condolences honey.
Oct. 21st, 2005 11:23 pm (UTC)
I have tears in my eyes. That's so, so sad.
Oct. 26th, 2005 08:09 pm (UTC)
That's completely terrifying. And also eerie in the way that I came about it.

I was reading up on Exclusive Breastfeeding via a link I found in a friends journal- after reading that I looked at her interests and clicked 'Aethelmearc' for shits and giggles, just to see who else had it as an interest, saw the Blue Feather community, said 'oh hey! I go to the cotillion whenever I manage Pennsic, I think I'll browse.' So while browsing, I saw that you had a Livejournal, and clicked over here, scrolled down, went: 'Hey, he's talking about breastfeeding.' And then everything was downhill from there. So terrible...

In the rare case you do remember me, I'm the girl who had a blue feather painted on her breast at Pennsic 32. You asked if you could touch it and then said something to the effect that that was the most action you'd ever had with a woman, and I blushed. That's my 15 minutes of Joshua the Imperfekt fame, right there.
( 19 comments — Comment )

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