Been meaning to post these for a while and I'm bored at work today. :)
I can personally vouch for these:
You Know You're From Philadelphia When...
You punctuate every sentence with, "You know" at least twice.
You want olive oil, not mayonnaise on your "hoagie".
You hate the Redskins
You hate Dallas.
You realize that your favorite dessert is "wooder ice".
You find yourself using "yo" and "youse guys" when talking long-distance to family members.
You know how to spell Schuylkill.
You pronounce ACME "ACK-A-ME".
You think that $2,500 a year for insurance on a 1977 Toyota Corolla is a bargain.
You find youself at a nice restaurant thinking "I wonder if they have cheese steaks?"
You sleep soundly through gunfire and ambulance sirens.
You visit New York and are impressed by how clean it is.
You can't eat french fries without Cheese Whiz.
You call sprinkles on top of your ice cream cone "jimmies".
You don't think Wawa sounds funny.
You snub a cheese steak that isn't on an Amoroso roll.
Your parents, brothers, sisters, aunts and uncles all live on the same block.
You know who Jim O'Brien is and how he died.
You can't imagine lunch without a Tastycake.
You're still not sure about Jerry Penacolli.
A vacation at the Jersey shore (pronounced "Down the shoore") is better than going to an island (there's more stuff to do, plus you know everybody.)
You know where to find the Rocky statue.
You know that only tourists go to Geno's, Pat's and Jim's for authentic cheese steaks.
You only go if you're drunk and it's 3:00 a.m.
You can make a cheese steak and you've never been taught
You've never been to the Liberty Bell, or the only time you were there was on a class trip in third grade.
You know what and where "Boathouse Row" is
You will buy a pretzel from anyone, anywhere without even thinking of where it was - or where his hands have been.
You can't imagine a breakfast without scrapple.
You don't know what a sub is, but you think they are trying to describe an imitation HOAGIE.
You aren't a bandwagon Sixers fan…you loved them when they sucked, and before they had A.I.
You go to The Gallery or South Street in the summer time just to chill.
You have the pizza place on speed dial.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Philadelphia.
These are all true for me so far, except for the ones where you actually had to grow up here to get:
You Know You're From San Diego When...
You'd driven from East County San Diego to a mall somewhere in North County because of one particular store you like.
You have a 12 month pass to the San Diego Zoo, San Diego Wild Animal Park, and Sea World.
You lost your virginity or first drank in TJ.
You're enjoying 80º weather at the end of February while those up north complain about 12 inches of snow.
The people at the local smoothie bar know you by name.
Your birth certificate indicates that you were born in Kaiser Hospital off of Zion Ave.
You can't leave the Del Mar Fair each summer without a plateful of Australian battered potatoes, a funnel cake, and other junk food.
Your tan lines never go away.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from San Diego.
And I've seen some of these actually happen, but I'll let Q say if they're all accurate or not:
You Know You're Filipino When....
Your middle name is your mother's maiden name.
Your parents call each other "Mommy" and "Daddy."
You have uncles and aunts named "Boy," "Girlie," or "Baby."
You have relatives whose nicknames consist of repeated syllables like "Jun-Jun," "Ling-Ling," and "Mon-Mon." Mine by the way was "Che-Che."
You call the parents of your friends and your own parents' friends "Tito" and "Tita."
You have four or five names.
You greet your elders by touching their hands to your forehead.
You always kiss your relatives on the cheek whenever you enter or leave the room.
You follow your parents' house rules even if you are over 18.
You live with your parents until and at times even after you're married.
You decorate your dining room wall with a picture of the "Last Supper."
You keep your furniture wrapped in plastic or covered with blankets.
You have a Sto. Nino shrine in your living room.
You have a piano that no one plays.
You keep a tabo in your bathroom.
You use Vicks Vapor rub as an insect repellant.
You eat with your hands.
You eat more than three times a day.
You think a meal is not a meal without rice.
You think sandwiches are snacks, not meals.
Your dining table has a merry-go-round (lazy Susan) in the middle.
You bring baon to work everyday.
Your pantry is never without Spam, Vienna sausage, corned beef, and sardines.
You love to eat daing or tuyo.
You prop up one knee while eating.
ou eat your meal with patis, toyo, suka, banana catsup, or bagoong.
Your tablecloths are stained with toyo circles.
You love sticky desserts and salty snacks.
You eat fried Spam and hot dogs with rice.
You eat mangoes with rice--with great GUSTO!
You love "dirty" ice cream.
You love to eat, yet often manage to stay slim.
You put hot dogs in your spaghetti.
Everything you eat is sauted in garlic, onion, and tomatoes.
You order a "soft drink" instead of soda.
You hang a rosary on your car's rear view mirror.
You get together with family at a cemetery on All Saint's Day to eat, drink, and tell stories by your loved ones' graves.
You play cards or mahjong and drink beer at funeral wakes.
You think Christmas season begins in October and ends in January.
Your second piece of luggage is a balikbayan box.
You've mastered the art of packing a suitcase to double capacity.
You collect items from airlines, hotels, and restaurants as "souvenirs."
You feel obligated to give pasalubong to all your friends and relatives each time you return from a trip.
You use paper foot outlines when buying shoes for friends and relatives.
You're a fashion victim.
You can convey 30 messages with your facial expression.
You hold your palms together in front of you and say "excuse, excuse" when you pass in between people or in front of the TV.
You ask for the bill at a restaurant by making a rectangle in the air.
You cover your mouth when you laugh.
You respond to a "Hoy!" or a "Pssst!" in a crowd.
You'll answer "Malapit lang!"--no matter the distance--when asked how far away a place is located.
Goldilocks is more than a fairy tale character to you.
You refer to power interruptions as "brownouts."
You love to use the following acronyms: CR for comfort room, DI for dance instructor, DOM for dirty old man, TNT for tago nang tago, KJ for kill joy, KSP for kulang sa pansin, OA for over-acting, TL for true love, BF for boyfriend and GF for girlfriend.
You say "rubber shoes" instead of sneakers, "ball pen" instead of pen, "stockings" instead of pantyhose, "pampers" instead of diapers, "ref" or "prijider" instead of refrigerator, "Colgate" instead of toothpaste, "canteen" instead of cafeteria, and "open" or "close" instead of turn on or turn off (as in the lights).
You use an umbrella for shade on hot summer days.
You like everything imported or "state-side."
You love ballroom dancing, bowling, pusoy, mah jong, billiards, and karaoke.
You have a relative who is a nurse.
When you're in a restaurant, you wipe your plate and utensils before using them.
You can squeeze 15 passengers into your five seater car without a second thought.
You wave a pom-pom on a stick around the food to keep the flies away.
You always ring a doorbell twice, assuming that the first ring was not heard.
You let the phone ring twice before answering, lest you appear overly eager.
Your other piece of luggage is a balikbayan box.
You use a rock to scrub yourself in the bath or shower.
You're proud to be Filapino - and you pass these jokes on to all your Filipino friends!